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Feb. 25th, 2011

lion king doink

One banana for the road...

Or why I can't commit.

Because my mother talks about marriage all the freaking time!

Ok, maybe not all the time. Maybe not even a lot of the time. But she DID bring me LINEN TABLE RUNNERS as a gift from the caribbean. WTF? Who does that? For my "Hope Chest". Yay. The silver I could handle. The candle holders... ok... But table clothes. I live at home, woman! None of this is making me want to get married faster.

Because my first serious relationship didn't really require monogamy.

I'm not kidding. My long-distance girlfriend would ask about the boys I was seeing and then we'd have cam sex her, the boy, and myself. Yay skype! I've never quite figured out monogamy since. Actually, this is a lie. I had a boyfriend or two before the threesome thing, and the first one especially was amazing, but after the threesome, I haven't figured out how to go back to one person.

Because you're too far away and I demand constant stimulation, err attention.

If you're not reassuring me, hugging me, hanging out with me, someone else will be.

May. 6th, 2010

foam

strange dreams

I've been having really vivid and somewhat stressful dreams.

cut hereCollapse )

Mar. 22nd, 2010

foam

(no subject)

Ok, so I think I want to become a librarian.

Mar. 18th, 2010

foam

(no subject)

I'm supposed to schedule for next fall semester next week and the thought of another semester makes me about cry. I'm so desperate to be out of school or burned out, I'm not even sure anymore, just that I don't want to be here anymore. Except for the part where the thought of moving home makes me really cry. I have friends here, a church, people. Dallas is some place where I have 3 people to hang out with and live under my parents. I'm not qualified for anything other than daycare and I have no idea what other options are out there.


I honestly think if I stay another semester I'll just be wasting my parents' money. I have no direction or tangible plans for this stupid degree that I don't really want at this point. But is quitting school after 3 years too much. I wish I knew a cave I could go live in. i have terrible grades, and even if I didn't it's not that I'd like to transfer anywhere. I just really want to not be in school of any sort. At all. When asked what I want, all I can say is a job where I'm done at closing time and don't have to bring it with me.


I dinner at a friend's house tonight; about 7 of us and I can't imagine leaving. But I have no idea what to do. I'm supposed to schedule to see a counselor about scheduling and I think I'm going to walk in there saying I want to drop out. I love my friends here so much and I love living on my own, but I despair at school right now, and have on and off since before I got to college. I never wanted to go, I was just expected to.

Mar. 15th, 2010

foam

(no subject)

So... who reads PostSecret? Raise your hand. Ok, good.
I mightily enjoy checking PS out every Sunday for my weekly voyeurism. I've never sent a secret in, BUT I've made PLAENTY. On my old harddrive there was a folder filled with secrets I had made. This harddrive is working towards it. At home, I could go through a couple drawers and pull out ones that actually got printed.
Reasons I've never sent one in:

  • lack of stamps

  • fear of recognition

  • almost everyone who would understand/recognize/be involved with one of my secrets is someone I know to read/have read PS


So instead I have a folder of JPEGs on my laptop, purged when the drive crashes; and I look.

In other news I went to a kickin St. Patrick's Day party Saturday night. Quite fun, but kind of weird after the fact. News flash, yo. It is weird to party with guys (no girls mind you, bc that might have made this less awkward, thnx) you know from church only to see them at church the NEXT day. 12 hours later. Arrgh. Of course this does mean, I have party friends who intersect with the church friends, finally. We'll see.

Mar. 2nd, 2010

foam

Wizard Wrock

So... I really like some of the Wizard rock music out there. Ministry of Magic being my favorite. So, I made a .zip file for Sara and then though I'd share with the internet. HERE: http://www.mediafire.com/file/ntzwvzy1woj/wrockmusic.zip

Jan. 26th, 2010

foam

(no subject)

I've been thinking about this one thing for a couple weeks.... cut for being a terrible person who says awful things. you've been warnedCollapse )

Also... you can watch full episodes of original Star Trek on cbs.com. I was looking for NCIS, which you can also watch.

Dec. 17th, 2009

foam

(no subject)

So I'm almost finished with Winter holiday gift shopping or wtf ever you want to call it. Anyway, I still need a couple things for my mom, something for Kelly (but I think she's telling me what she wants, lol), and something for Sara M. And I don't know what! I got something for Jessica and Lee and I can't think of anyone else I need something for.
Suggestions?

I other news my dad bought me penguin shaped cookie cutter today.

Nov. 16th, 2009

foam

candycanes and schedueles(pronounced shedewelles, of course)

I finally got a schedule for next semester. English, because I never got around to finishing that. Survey in art history, the second one, I have credit for the first one from AP art history. Gothic art history - northern Europe from 1150 to 1450. And Survey in Mondern Art. I'm looking for a minor. I really have no idea, you guys.

In other news, my roommate came home from the grocery store with 3 varieties of candy cane, none of which are peppermint! We have cherry rainboow, chocolate mint, and Spree. It's pretty exciting. We're waiting to open them until we watch the Big Bang Theory tonight. bc that's our favorite show and if you don't watch it you should. House is too dramatic. We watch tv for escapism, so c'mon!

Laura(the roommate) and I also decided that if we're watching tv or something we can interject "Dog!" to point out cute dogs (aka ANY dog) on tv without being rude or having to explain ourselves. It's nice to live with someone who gets you, lol.

I think it's time for some coffee.

Nov. 1st, 2009

lion king doink

(no subject)

So... I'm resigning for the semester. That means I'm leaving classes early and not getting grades or credit for the semester. But I'm enrolled for next semester and this lets me stay in good standing at school and not wreck my GPA. I'm not going home, I'm staying in BR to see "every career counselor you can think of" and "figure out what you're actually happy studying" (my parents). And I am so freaking relieved! I'm not failing out of school and I'm not quitting. I'm changing my major and figuring things out. 

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